Best Sext Ever

I got an exciting sext message from my friend Amy a few minutes ago. (Sext is short for surprising text, right?) It said, “Your book is on Amazon already!”

Isn’t it exciting that I have a friend who, even when she’s sexting, writes out the word your, capitalizes the word Amazon, and closes with appropriate punctuation?

Oh, and I guess I am also pretty excited that this book thing is actually really happening! I’m so excited I want to use a ridiculous number of exclamation points! Can I? Just this once? Thank you.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here’s the link. It doesn’t come out until September, but check it out. Have your friends check it out. Turn to the person to your right and ask him or her to check it out. Write your congressperson. Does anyone know Oprah? Can you put in a good word for me?

Extra! Extra! Read All About Me and My Grammar Crusade!

We made the OC Register!

Here's the link:

Grammar lady spikes her lessons with humor | grammar, people, students - Life - The Orange County Register

The September Issue

I apologize if I’ve been relatively absent from the blogosphere in these early days of September, but I got myself involved in something that took a lot longer than I thought it would. But I did it: I finally made it through Vogue’s September issue. I’ll be honest with you; after the first 150 advertisements, I didn’t think I could do it anymore. It wasn’t just because my arms were giving out under the magazine’s weight, but I started to descend into the kind of depression that comes when you realize that a pair of shoes is worth more than you are.

But I had to read it because I love fashion, and the September issue is considered thee most important issue of the year. It’s full of all the must-have hats and boots and scarves and coats for the fall season. Landing the cover of a fashion magazine’s September issue is a great honor.

Since September’s not over yet, I have decided to throw my hat into the ring. My friend took these pics of me for her digital photography class, and I am going to post them here in the hopes that a fashion magazine editor will notice me.

I was hoping to make the cover of ElleMNOP, Glammar, or even Webster’s Bazaar.

Driving Alone in My Grammarmobile

Ladies, are you sick of driving? Are you sick of suffering through traffic while the man in your life is slumped in the passenger's seat immersed in a game of Angry Birds? Here’s a solution. Do this to the inside of your car:

I guarantee you that he will insist on taking his car everywhere!

I’m not going to lie; I’ve been pretty obsessed with my grammarmobile. Consequently, I’ve given it a pretty extreme makeover.

Here are some before pics:

And here she is now:



Isn't she cute?

And I'm not even finished yet!

So far the response has been pretty awesome. I’ve been getting honks (I guess people have been dangling their participles), thumbs-ups, an “I love you” yelled from a grammar lover in the lane over, funny comments, and best of all—a writing gig. I was asked to write a grammar article for a magazine.

So far, I've learned a lot from this whole grammarmobile experience:

* It pays to promote.

* It's a bad idea to cut someone off when you have your website scrawled all over your vehicle.

* If I ever feel like I need some alone time in the house, I will invest in some pink shag carpeting.

Grammarmobile

Kit, be quiet for a sec.

Batmobile, go back to your cave.

The General Lee, open your doors for…

The Missed Periods Grammarmobile!

This weekend I transformed my Corolla into a grammar awareness spreading machine. Together, we will fight comma crimes, save dangling participles, restore punctuation peace to the land (and, you know, promote my blog). It’s not finished yet, but I here’s what I’ve done so far:

The next one is a little blurry. It says, "Friends don't let friends write drunk."

This one is kind of blurry too. (Cut me some slack. I'm not a photographer.) It says, "Practice intentional acts of punctuation."

I just want to make the world a safer place to write.