Saturday, August 11, 2012

Premature Ejaculation


I got home from work the other night and there was a package for me waiting outside my front door. I was like, “Cool, my new ThighMaster has finally arrived!” And then I thought, “Wait, maybe it’s the Shake Weights.” But, no, it was neither; it was a box of books. A box of MY books! 

I know, I know; all I’ve been talking about lately is my stupid book coming out. But consider yourselves warned; I am going to promote the hell out of this thing until I’ve made enough off of royalties to afford a Fifty Shades of Grey penthouse in Seattle.

Guess what else I learned about the book yesterday? It’s being prematurely ejaculated! Amazon changed its release date from September 1 to August 15. So now I am kind of FREAKING OUT!

As I am sure is the case with many authors, I’m really kind of uncomfortable with the idea of self-promotion, BUT those penthouses go for between 4 to 6 million dollars, so here I go:

I was thinking to ease into the promotional activities. All you have to do to win an Advanced Readers Copy of the illustrious Missed Periods and Other Grammar Scares is “Like” me. 

There’s a “Like” option at this Amazon link I would love you to click.

If you want to win a copy, just let me know in the comments section that you do, in fact, “Like” me and that I have a way to contact you to get your address. Then, I will have a drawing next week. How does Wednesday sound? 

(Also, because this is such an emotional time for me, feel free to also let me know HOW MUCH you like me, what exactly you like about me, if you like my hair, etc. )

132 comments:

Janette Dolores said...

I "liked" your book on Amazon. I also like your writing voice, the fact that you don't correct my grammar mistakes (yet), and your intriguing blog post titles.

Congrats again on the book launch!

Smooches...

Stephen T. McCarthy said...

OK, I went to the Amazon page and licked you. Uh... wait. That should be "liked", I "LIKED" you.

I liked you, I REALLY liked you! (I like Sally Field, too.)

What do I like about you? Well, I like the way you inject humor into your English lessons. And your hair, of course! Of course I like your hair.

If I win a free book in the drawing, I will Email you with my Email address. Unless you already has it? (How's that for grammar? I NEED this book!)

~ D-FensDogg
'Loyal American Underground'

James Garcia Jr. said...

I guess I had a case of that premature...ah, you know. I had already liked the book. :)
What I simply adore about you is how you continue to visit my blog and leave your little comments. I love that. You also crack me up with how you continue to catch my attention with creepy titles like this one. Too funny!
Talk to you soon.

-Jimmy

Theresa Milstein said...

I love your hair. I'm jealous of your hair. Mine is curly, and I only like if I straighten it. But you have thick, wavy hair like my sister.

I can't believe the book is coming out this fast! Usually books get put off--not released earlier. WoW! I can't wait to read it. If you want to be my blog earlier, let me know.

Shelly said...

Hooray!!! Premature is better than too late. I've liked it and will write a happy review about it when it's time. Looking forward to it!

Powdered Toast Man said...

I would love a free book, in fact what else are you giving away? I love free stuff. So I "liked" the amazon page. And I like you as much as you like me. (Please like me a lot)

Jemi Fraser said...

Of course I like you! And I liked you ... if that makes sense (I'm pretty sure it's grammatically correct though! :)

the late phoenix said...

i don't just "like" you, i like you. premature ejaculation is never a good thing, whether real or as a literal concept, oh the tales us menfolk could tell. i rented a few THE HOBBIT penthouses down the street...for hairy feet...

Meike Najarian said...

My dearest Jen ....the fact that it comes out on my birthday is just fate , just bloody fantastic! I will be ordering my copy and can't wait to dive in. I'm so very proud of you!!! Xo

Meike Najarian said...

My dearest Jen ....the fact that it comes out on my birthday is just fate , just bloody fantastic! I will be ordering my copy and can't wait to dive in. I'm so very proud of you!!! Xo

Meike Najarian said...

My dearest Jen ....the fact that it comes out on my birthday is just fate , just bloody fantastic! I will be ordering my copy and can't wait to dive in. I'm so very proud of you!!! Xo

Meike Najarian said...

My dearest Jen ....the fact that it comes out on my birthday is just fate , just bloody fantastic! I will be ordering my copy and can't wait to dive in. I'm so very proud of you!!! Xo

Carol Kilgore said...

I LIKED your book! I really, really want to like you more. Do you have an author page? I gave you a tag, but you have to LIKE it :)

Arlee Bird said...

When my buddy Stephen T McCarthy likes someone then there must be a good reason. I like your wit and style, so I liked you on Amazon. I guess they just couldn't wait to get your book out there.


Lee
Wrote By Rote

Terra Shield said...

Yikes, it's brought forward? Ok, I need to start working on my post about your book to be able to put it up on time.

Holly Vance said...

I have no qualms with promoting myself, nor my friends. Congrats!

DiscConnected said...

I went to Amazon and done the deed.

Why do I like you?

I started out to be an english teacher (three years before switching majors to business) and switched because I was afraid I would not get a job.

You stuck with it, and have developed a way to teach the topic in an amusing way.

Pretty cool.

It's not so much that I like the hair, as I am jealous of it (having very little of my own).

Larry

vbtremper said...

I "liked" your book on Amazon. I like the name of your blog/book. I like your sense of humor. I like your hair - I don't have the patience to grow mine out that long (and mine looks better short).

-Vicki

Dylan Fitzgerald said...

Forget the drawing, I just ordered mine... as in, four seconds ago. THE GRAND HIGH MISSED PERIODS FAN CLUB HEREBY COMES TO ORDER. First order of business: all those in favor of electing the fabulous, glamorous, grammarous Jen as Empress Regnant of Universal Grammar issues, say aye. AYE! The ayes have it. SO PASSED.

(Also I did like you on Amazon!)

Wendy Ramer, Author said...

Jenny,
I'd like to win a copy. What do I like about you? That you're a language professor like me but that you are so much funnier than I am when it comes to grammar (though I do consider myself a ham in the classroom...and I don't even like ham).

In addition to hopefully winning a copy of your book, would it be inappropriate of me to steal your giveaway idea????

I'll wait for your permission...or banishing admonishment.

Felt Family said...

Liked it and will love it when I read it! I like your humor, your grammar lessons, your cute brown belt in your profile pic, and of course your grammar-mobile.

DWei said...

Congrats on having the release date moved up to Wednesday!

Lynda R Young said...

oh how exciting! Congratulations!! I liked.

Talli Roland said...

Haha! The title made me laugh - love how you connected it to your book launch! off to hit 'like'.

Jono said...

How do I "Like" thee? Let me count the ways! I remember those "premature" days of yesteryear as if they were last week. Now I'm just immature.
Always remember and never forget that "Like" is a many splendored thing. It is better to have "Liked" and lost than never to have "Liked" at all.

Sara said...

I liked you on Amazon, but I had already ordered a copy! If I'm the lucky winner, I'll keep the ARC (a rare opp) and give my ordered copy as a gift. :)

vawriter said...

Even your "Comments" page is funnier than the average blog. Not only did I "Like" you on Amazon, but I requested that it become available on my Kindle! People too cheap to buy your book any other way would spring for the e-version. I've been a big fan of your blog and know I will love the book, so please toss my name into the basket for a free copy. I hope Amazon sells out!

vawriter said...

Oh, and you can find me at my blog, Conversion of a Blogaphobe, or email me at wordsbylinda@aol.com and I'll be happy to tell you where to send it!

Michael Di Gesu said...

Hi, Jenny,


Popping over from Ej's blog... You book sounds like a must for me. LOL.

Nice to meet you! I will be ordering my copy now. I just wanted to drop by and say hi.

Mike Allison said...

Excellent information provide about premature ejaculation for solving sexual problem.

Conrad Baumgartner said...

I jazz e'er seen grouping start to hold real supernatural on specified topics; this is a sober and main line in every azygos cause's invigoration.
Mellissa Miura

Georgia Stapleton said...

Info is out of this world, I would bang to see more from your writers. ZN Wap Advice

Stephanie Finkel said...

I am sure you have a great fan following out there.
valentine hearts

Jeri Doyle said...

Your articles don't displace around the bushes correct t to the part.
TRAVELTOLONDON

betty kelly said...

Interesting information I haven’t been through such information in a long time. payday loans online

Daniel Kwok said...

Your blogs and its stuff magnetize me to return again n again. PPIClaims.me

chiris cole said...

This stuff is down t earth, hats off buds out there.
pay day loans

chiris cole said...

Interesting information I haven’t been through such information in a long time.
cash advance

Robert German said...

Wasp dudes! Amazing stuff continues the good work. android 3.0 tablet

Alica Stonham said...

I am surely coming again for more contents of yours.
mentholeliquid

Alica Stonham said...

Your blogs are totally worth giving time and energy.
PPI reClaim

Richard Sandberg said...

An unbelievable blog. This blog will indisputably be definitely recommended to my friends as well.Relationship Advice by Bare Factory

Alica Stonham said...

This blog post is really great; the standard stuff of the post is genuinely amazing. PPI

Norman Seymour said...

I love to read and appreciate your work.
compensation claims

Zara Whitaker said...

I’m definitely coming again to see these articles and blogs. AccidentClaimsCo.org.uk

Howard Keller said...

Hurrah, that’s what I was trying to get for, just what a stuff Presented at this blog!! Thanks admin of the site.
whole life insurance quote

hawai mindas said...

Quality stuff may be the key to invite the users to visit begin to see the blog site, that’s what this site provides. list of android phones

stefin fleming said...

A very nice stuff this is what I was looking for!! I was looking for the blogs and sincerely I have got the good work here.

stefin fleming said...

griffin technology Best work done guys, creative contents are here.

Sir ackent said...

auto insurance quotes
The information you have given in the blog really marvelous and more interesting.

ALBERT LIET said...

Your blogs are truly awesome I have no words to praise for your blogs. Premier Ad Brokerage Love Tips

Sir ackent said...

Payday Loan Excellent effort to make this blog more wonderful and attractive.

depra parker said...

The Info in the blog is out of this world, I so want to read more. life insurance term rates

Robert Whitworth said...

This text may be value everyone’s attention. How will I learn more? free credit score

john grand said...

The quality of information that you are providing is simply marvelous. droid apps free

rishan safar said...

congratulations guys, quality information you have given!!! online tutors

Seth Danks said...

It feels awesome to read such informative and unique articles on your websites. ppicalculator

Fred Haro said...

Great blog you people have made here on this blog site, I will absolutely appreciate your work. urbanities

Seth Danks said...

Thanks for sharing this information its really nice. PPI Claims

stevejohn john said...

I sent your articles links to all my contacts and they all love it including me. Wooden Garage

Edwin Southard said...

Marvelous work pals, I love reading your articles. android google tablet

jhony bravo said...

Hey great stuff nice info your passing on. easy website builder

saranya zinavo said...

It was a beneficial workout for me to go through your webpage.
very happy to read your blog
Website Designers Bangalore

Howard Keller said...

The blog and data in this, is very good and informative also. bank investment

Alina John said...

I think I have really come on the right place for getting the perfect info.language tutoring

Frencis Merchant said...

This is one of the most important blogs that I have seen, keep it up!car insurance quotes

jak won said...

These blogs are valuable because these are providing such informative information for all the people.http://www.stunningloftconversions.co.uk

Mickey James said...

I have been really impressed by going through this awesome blog.
solar panels cost

Berta Hargrove said...

Your write-ups are far more than wow!
riot point codes

francis beth said...

Continue the good work; keep posting more n more n more.
payday loans

Zachary Rizzuto said...

I never ever read such type of info before this was really incredible.ee customer service

Web Designer in Bangalore said...

Excellent comments with interesting topics and very useful resources. Thanks for sharing.
Web Development Company Bangalore

tina john said...

Nice to read this article will be very helpful in the future, share more info with us. Good job! social media infographics

tina john said...

Well, I have got the best information from here the site is fully stuffed with the knowledgeable information. social media infographics

tina john said...

I hope you will share such type of impressive contents again with us so that we can utilize it and get more advantage. infographics

tina john said...

This article has some vast and valuable information about this subject. infographics

tina john said...

It is extremely nice to see the greatest details presented in an easy and understanding manner. infographics

tina john said...

Just saying thanks wouldn’t just be enough, for the fantastic fluency in your writing. infographics

john meralaskd said...

Thank you I am glad about the encouragement! I love your site, you post outstanding. infographics

john meralaskd said...

Excellent Blog! I have been impressed by your thoughts and the way you infographics

john meralaskd said...

I have never been to such type of posts before truly remarkable stuff it has. infographics

john meralaskd said...

Your blogs have allured me a lot. I’ll again visit this great site to get more valuable stuff. social media infographics

john meralaskd said...

Your blogs have allured me a lot. I’ll again visit this great site to get more valuable stuff. social media infographics

BRAX TON said...

I would be supportive on all your articles and blogs as a result of they are simply up to the mark.Best shampoo for oily hair

tina john said...

Your site is for sure worth bookmarking. vietnam travel

Gexton said...

I have seen so many sites but never saw this type of work that has won my heart!!
bad credit mortgage

Zachary Rizzuto said...

These are actually wonderful some ideas in the blog. You have touched good quality points here. In whatever way continue writing.
auto insurancerates

Gexton said...

Outstanding efforts for making this blog!! Your writers and your work are really appreciative.
courier services in London

thomas morrison said...

I never ever read such type of info before this was really incredible.
compare car insurance rates

thomas morrison said...

I never ever read such type of info before this was really incredible.
compare car insurance rates

Thomas Edison said...

Your blogs and its stuff magnetize me to return again n again. christina wu bridal

Gexton said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kingloin said...

The blog is quite awesome that has provided me the best knowledge.


en/vietnam travel

Gexton said...

Your blogs are truly awesome I have no words to praise for your blogs.
Android App in Pakistan

thomas morrison said...

Awesome! Immense information there.
best credit repair

Gexton said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Richard Sandberg said...

I constantly emailed this site post page to all my friends, because if prefer to read it then my all friends will too.is bubblegum casting legitimate

aleena rose said...

Thumbs up guys you are really carrying out a great job.
buy twitter followers UK

aleena rose said...

I’m trampled for the blogs writings and also blogs.
Generic High Competition - social anxiety treatment (search volume = 1300)

Nice Man said...

The blog has offered the great knowledge I really enjoyed a lot by reading this.

Manhattan central booking

thomas morrison said...

Awesome! Immense information there.
lexingtonlaw reviews

saim disoza said...

ou people have actually provided the best blogs that are easy to understand for the folks.ny criminal attorney

saim disoza said...

This is an informative blog by which I have got that info which I really wanted to get.0green coffee bean extract

Nice Man said...

Appreciate you guys you are doing a really terrific job.

free media player download

saim disoza said...

You people have actually provided the best blogs that are easy to understand for the folks.vietnam holiday

julia john said...

Your content shows the power, I’m about to add this to my bookmarks.
credit repair companies

Angel sky said...

The blog has offered the great knowledge I really enjoyed a lot by reading this.

home security companies

Dolph ziggler said...

Regarding all aspects the blog was perfectly nice. green coffee bean extract weight loss

Master Mind said...

The blog has offered the great knowledge I really enjoyed a lot by reading this.
brisbane electrician

nice name said...

The blog has offered the great knowledge I really enjoyed a lot by reading this.

http://centralbookingbronx45.eklablog.com/

ramas samar said...

Your work is totally enthusiastic and informative.
central booking queens

Thomas Edison said...

I envisage feeling to have the increase that your knowledge.

Manhattan central booking

liena rose said...

We are dealing in superior quality of methylone, our research center takes very step to produce the best quality methylone.for more detail visit our site

http://methyloneshoppe.com/

Cool boy said...

The blog has offered the great knowledge I really enjoyed a lot by reading this.book a apartment marrakech

grady williams said...

I wana thank you for providing instructive and qualitative stuff so often. patterson eye doctors

divya chirsty said...

This blog post is really great; the standard stuff of the post is genuinely amazing..

Web Design Company Bangalore

deny lost said...

I wonder why other professionals don’t notice your website much m glad I found this. luxury Villas Marrakech

kent clark said...

The quality of information that you are providing is simply marvelous. Medical Negligence

kent clark said...

I’m flattened for your blogs writings and blogs as well. watch repair

Jones Henry said...

Job well done guys, quality information. blind date

kent clark said...

Thanks for sharing this information its really nice. infographics

kent clark said...

I need more articles and blogs please post soon. blog post service

kent clark said...

I would be flattened if all websites gave articles like that. High PR blog post service

90ououoi said...

Your articles are more than wow! Password Manager

Lisa John said...

Hey great stuff nice info your passing on tennis court maintenance

Lisa John said...

Hey great stuff nice info your passing on tennis court maintenance

francy said...

Its great really! thanx for share to everyone...
Web Design Company Bangalore
Web Designing Bangalore
Web Designer Bangalore

Angel Rio said...

Quality stuff may be the key to invite the users to visit begin to see the blog site, that’s what this site provides.online payday loans in tennessee

Mykiddy tracker said...

Nice post....
child tracker india

bruce atherton said...

Do you feel confident enough in the bedroom? Many men are reluctant about giving a positive answer. Performance anxiety and concerns about their size top the list when it comes to sources of uncertainty. independent prosolution review

Moorthy Machendran said...

Great blog post. I assure you that I really enjoyed a lot in reading.
Best Web Hosting in India |
Top 5 VPS Hosting in India |
Top 5 Shared Hosting in India

Jim Anson said...

The male enhancement exercises are techniques that stimulate new tissue formation. There are various different possibilities – stretching, jelqing, kegel exercises and ballooning are just a few of the possible option. helpful extenze website