Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Are You a Grammar Snob?

1. 1. You have been looking for a car to buy on Craigslist for three hours straight. Finally, you find the car of your dreams. It’s got low mileage, it's priced well under Blue Book, and it “runs good.” You…
A. Email straight away to say that you are interested. At least it doesn’t “run bad.”
B. Click away in disgust. If the seller doesn’t know how to use adverbs correctly, how can he or she be trusted to have diligently changed the oil?

2. 2. You’ve been winked at by someone on eHarmony. And this person is super hot! You check out the profile and find that the winker is looking for a comittment.


A. You wink right back. Even though it’s spelled incorrectly, that’s the closest you’ve come to someone interested in commitment in a long time.
B. You blink away the tears. Why do the good ones always have to be such terrible spellers?

3. 3. You have been unemployed for three months, and you finally landed an interview at a pretty cool company. The boss hires you on the spot and tells you that you will “love everyone who you will be working with in your department.”
A. You decline the offer. You know that you will never be able to respect a boss who doesn’t know the difference between who and whom.
B. You accept the offer eagerly. You are smarter than your boss. Eventually, you will take over the office and then the world…

4. It’s Christmastime, and your first grader has just come home from school with a list of “presence” for Santa.
A. This is great news! Someone just went from the nice list to the naughty one. You are going to save so much money now.
B. It could be worse. At least your first grader didn’t ask for Satan’s presence.

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20 comments:

Shelly said...

This made me laugh! The last one reminded me of a particular 8th grader I once taught. He wanted to shock me. He wrote, "I worship Satin."

I wrote back on his paper, "Personally, I've always preferred silk."

Lorena said...

Hey, bad spellers deserve to find love, too. I would definitely give him another chance! ;)

Loved this!

JJ said...

My spelling is atrocious ! Seriously.
:)

Gorilla Bananas said...

"I'm good" is grammatically correct but means "I'm well" in America. So what do you say if you're a person of good character?

Crystal Pistol said...

Satan's presence??? Oh my gosh! Hilarious! You make grammar THE COOLEST thing since sliced bread! So glamorous, really.

Did you know the word grammar came from the word glamour? (I'm sure you did know that but I wanted you to know I too know that fact. :) Great post!

notesfromnadir said...

What hilarious examples. No, DON'T buy a car on Craigslist no matter how the owner claims it runs! :)

Bethany Elizabeth said...

That's hilarious! :) Recently, an old family friend made contact with me and we've been emailing a lot. He just sent another email. I know he's super nice, but my first thought upon reading it was, "why can't you just use paragraphs?"

the late phoenix said...

this is the internet, the domain of fantasy, so i have mad respect for WHOMever and WHOever answers #3 with B

Janet Johnson said...

Loved this! But I'd just be glad my first grader was writing a word longer than "cat"! :)

Theresa Milstein said...

Bummer. I took the quiz, but the high school denied access to the quiz results. I'll have to return to find out how I did.

Kelly Polark said...

Hilarious!!
I am not a grammar snob, but I am a speller snob. It irks me when people misspell things on Facebook!!

Meagan Spooner said...

So yeah, I'm a snob... but that comes as absolutely NO surprise to me! As I said offhand to a friend with whom I'm hunting for apartments, I have an inherent mistrust of people with a bad command of basic grammar.

Stephanie Faris said...

I guess I'm very forgiving of poor grammar. Living in the South, I have to be!

Yarnlady said...

Oh gee-sh Captain! I married a bad speller...but he has impeccable grammar.
My spelling is pretty good but my grammar sucks.
We make a wonderful couple of corrections!

M.K. Nissen said...

I'm 50% a grammar snob so I guess that ain't so bad! My husband couldn't spell his way out of a paper bag, so I'm used to seeing the world in a rainbow of misspelled words! Everything else grammar-wise on his part is up for debate as well. It's good one of us can write because who else would write the yearly Christmas letter and thank-you notes?

Glynis Peters said...

I am 25% and neutral. My spelling is stronger than my grammar so I could never be a snob.

Talli Roland said...

Love this quiz! I'm a grammar snob. No surprise there!

Jemi Fraser said...

the final one totally cracked me up!!!

Meg O. said...

I LOVE THIS. I love you.

K Najarian said...

Thank you. I thought I was alone in my grammar-snobbiness. (Yes, I did just get the red underline for using the word snobbiness-oops, there it is again!) Maybe I should give this some more thought. Hmmm...