Does Size Matter?

Is it the size of the boat, or is it the motion of the ocean? Do all good things come in small packages, or should we go big or go home? Is it really the little things that make a difference, or should we look at the big picture?

Obviously, we are terribly conflicted about size in this country. On the one hand, we boast the Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger, but on the other hand, we spend $40 billion a year on diets. On the one hand, we say that we like our men tall, dark and handsome, yet on the other hand, Justin Bieber.

Our ambivalence about size is nowhere more clearly reflected than in our titles.

It seems as though the “bigger is better” proponents insisted that we keep the small words in titles lowercase, and the “less is more” supporters were like, “Hey, that’s not fair!”

So, they compromised. Some small words in titles are capitalized and some are not.

For example,

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

“With a Little Help from My Friends”

So, what’s the deal? Why is the capitalized if it only has three letters, but from isn’t and it has four? Why is in lowercased but my is capitalized, yet they both only have two letters?

I know, I know. Compromises are always disappointing- like nonfat ice cream.

Well, first of all, all words are capitalized if they begin or end a title- no matter which ones they are. But, if the following words are embedded in a title, they are not capitalized.

• Articles (a, an, the)

Dream a Little Dream

• FANBOYS (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so)

The Elves and the Shoemaker

• Prepositions of four or fewer letters (in, on, to, by, with, from, for, of, with)

Big Trouble in Little China

All of the other small words are capitalized when they are used in a title, like As, Is, My, Am, I, Me, You.

And, now on to the next issue: Do good things come to those who wait, or does the early bird get the worm?